Luxuriating in my mess
When I'm sickeningly seduced by my own fall
When I'm staring at the wine
When you ask me and I cry
Falling to the ground like a silly sorry fawn
When I'm poisonous to touch
When I need your love too much
Seeing only all the things in life I hate
When my words are laced with spite
When I crush you with my might
Stabbing tragedies of family with vanity
When I blame it all on history
When I burden you with mystery
Carrying all the weight of them upon my back
When I think I am too brilliant
When I'm on the verge of hideous
Strutting like a man who's lost his mind
When I see how I could damage
I have to take a breath
When I think about a marriage
It makes me think of death
When I stand outside and see myself
It makes me feel ashamed
The little life that I shall hold
Must never know this pain
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